Positivity versus CFS...

To me this is an interesting subject.. with many variations in the beliefs that whilst suffering from CFS we cannot adhere to positivity... as is what's the point?? many suffers find themselves going down that path of belief... and simply give up, which, in return opens up an avenue for anxiety, depression, panic attacks etc... to take over there lifestyle... somewhere... after the onset of CFS, they seem to have lost there determination... and have developed little or no coping skills...

Many people with CFS, feel frustrated and let down after finding out that there is no "cure" for there condition... and it can only be "managed" and through time.. this "management" allows us to view ourselves as active, resourceful and competent individuals... "yes, maybe we had a really bad day yesterday.... but what the heck" tomorrow will be better.... ignoring the positivity within... opens up a mine field... and you will find yourself feeling as if you are being attacked from all angles.... not good!!!!

 

 

 

Ignoring all the positive aspects within your lifestyle may lead to a change in your behaviour... which may result in withdrawal from activities which at one point were normally enjoyable will lead to the loss of self confidence... yes, there is no "cure" and you know that this illness is unlikely to go away anytime soon... this knowledge is enough to make you feel frustrated and despaired... the negative thoughts of this situation can and do... become overwhelming... this is totally understandable... but without an input of positivity... negativity will thrive... when you are feeling tense or low... these negative thoughts and images.. will go through your mind... and whether you are aware of them or not... they will still have an impact on you... these thoughts have been labeled "self -talk" and are usually automatic... it is important to be aware of them... as this negative "self-talk" often leads to feelings of depression, anxiety and helplessness...

Negative self- talk "Self-talk" is not bad, or wrong... or a sign of psychological problems... It is normal. But... negative "self-talk" prevents us from solving problems, and can contribute to a variety of psychological problems, including depression. When faced with a problem, if our "self-talk is negative" it can immobilize us. "I can't do this, I'm just going to foul it up again" or "I'll probably get fired after they see how incompetent I am." Psychologists help depressed individuals identify negative "self-talk" and also teach them how to challenge these negative statements, and how to replace them with positive "self-talk"

Positive self-talk Is a way of describing all the things we say to ourselves all day long as we confront obstacles, make decisions, and resolve problems... "Self-talk" is not "talking to yourself" in a literal sense... although it sometimes does involve talking out loud (depending on the person). There is a myth... that when you talk to yourself, it is a sign of "craziness" or mental illness. That idea stems from the "voices" or auditory hallucinations experienced in severe forms of mental illness, such as schizophrenia. When a person hears voices, he/she thinks it is someone else talking to them. The self-talk we are describing here is not like that at all. We all engage in self-talk. Usually, it is part of our thinking process, or what we call "stream of consciousness." As we are presented with problems, or decisions, we might think, "Okay, how do I handle this?" or "This looks like it is difficult, I better ask for help." or "I know how to fix this!"

CFS WITHOUT POSITIVITY = DISASTER

Stress... thoughts and moods... can also have a can also have some effect on your fatigue... but the relationship between CFS and tension is not a straightforward one... there is no doubt that tension increases pain and discomfort... and in return... the pain and discomfort increases the tension... this then becomes a vicious circle.... tension itself... affects you both physically and psychologically... both at the same time... when you are feeling uptight.. your body becomes tense... the most common physical signs of tension are tight and sore muscles , but breathing can become quicker... and your heartbeat can increase... muscle tension is common with CFS as various postures can be adopted in order to protect the painful areas... this learned behaviour... is far from being helpful... as it results in causing tension and discomfort in other parts of the body... and leaves muscles unused... which can then be uncomfortable... or painful when trying to use them later... learning to control the tension... through muscular relaxation techniques... will itself lead to a reduction of pain and fatigue... and this as a whole leaves you feeling less frustrated....

CFS... affects... your everyday life... and yes, you have probably found that certain factors.. or activities that seem to make your existing condition worse... so you find yourself... avoiding such factors/activities... this is totally understandable... who in there right mind wants to increase their fatigue/symptoms??? but remember one thing...

THE FEAR OF HURTING... IS OFTEN MORE CRIPPLING THAN THE DISCOMFORT ITSELF.....

Therefore... there are several factors.. to consider before making a decision to give up an activity... due to the potential increase in pain and discomfort

  1. Giving in to pain or discomfort means that you will be doing less and less... leaving you in a position.. of little or no motivation...this action.. has the opposite effect than what was originally intended... as pain and discomfort may become more prominent when you are less active...
  2.  

  3. Never cease an activity on the belief.. that it may cause physical damage... this is not the case... although.. it is advisable to make a note of any major change in pain/sensation... which may occur after an increase in activity... but please bear in mind... any increase in activity... may initially cause a level of discomfort which will recede in time....
  4.  

  5. Do not stop an activity on selective judgment... as this activity itself... may not have have caused the increase on your discomfort... and you will have denied yourself... the ability to participate on an enjoyable activity...
  6.  

  7. When the pain and discomfort are at a peak... it is totally understandable to try and avoid any activity at all... but you have nothing to lose by being active... as you know that your condition cannot get any worse... and keeping busy may stop you from dwelling on it...
  8.  

  9. It may prove more beneficial to change your activity... rather than reducing it... you may already have an idea.. of what activity that doesn't suit you... maybe you could substitute it for a more appropriate one...
  10.  

It is also useful to ask yourself.. the following questions...

What have I given up doing since I have had CFS?
What things would I like to start again?
What new things would I like to be doing in the future?
What are the reasons.. for not doing as much as I used to?

I have learned... that avoidance is a perception of denial... you must face your targets.. be positive... and hey.. if you do not at the particular time... to succeed in your task... try again later.... what have you got to lose???

Yes... I know... it isn't easy... but we get there eventually... I through time... have developed my own coping mechanisms... and positivity.... it has taken me 4 years to accomplish.. a comfortable level... on both aspects...and with coping mechanisms... positivity... and determination.. you find that you are able to combat CFS (well sometimes... but at least it's something)

My bible consists of...

At times... I'm unable to string a sentence together... I laugh at myself...

Yes, I'm feeling rubbish today... yippee!!!! I don't need to clean the house.... (I hate housework anyway)

Ooppss... at the moment.. I'm unable to pick my son up from school... I'll never manage to get there.. well I did try... but it was difficult even walking to the front door... oh well.. it's raining anyway... it'll save me from getting wet... and ask a friend to bring him home...

And regardless... of how I'm feeling... I'll always be better in the morning....etc.. etc...

I've had 4 years of practice... and I will never learn to live with my condition... but acceptance is creeping in... what else can I do??? worry??? that will change nothing.. yes I still get peeved off at times... but I still manage... (errrmm... I think) I have created a facade... around others... as in I have no illness.. at all.. but unfortunately... at times... I am caught... ooppss!!!! and questions are asked...

As a whole... CFS is just portrayed as fatigue.. and pain in the joints... and as fellow CFS suffers... we know better... it also comes part and parcel... with a whole load of disabling characteristics...

MAYBE SOMEDAY... THE PROFESSIONALS WILL LISTEN....

Just because they can't find a reason... it doesn't mean that it's not real... and at this moment in time... millions... of REAL people... are suffering from a REAL illness... we can't all be imagining it!! can we??? me thinks not!!!